Author: uberbudgie





So, I was Nick Twisp from the book

"Youth in Revolt", only in a full leather

suit that looked like something Johnny

Cash might wear. I looked like a young

Johnny Dep and had a Dirty Harry gun

and was with Malcolm McDowell, who

was wearing his costume from A Clockwork

Orange, who had a cane as well as a

Dirty Harry gun.



We were in this weird little town that looked

cross between the Pike Place Market in

Seattle; Carson City, Nevada; and the

scenery in Sergio Leone movies. The

booths at the market were selling dusty

feather boas and pvc fetishwear. Two

supersized and very expensive looking

sex workers with bright magenta

eyeshadow were eyeing us as we went

through the stores looking for Shawni.



Shawni has my wallet and we're looking

for Shawni but she's not there.



Then we had to catch the train but when

we got to the station, we found out that

the engineer had sold the train for scrap

to buy the exotic imported train set he

was playing with in the ticket office.



It went wall to wall with all sorts of weird

levers, and the cars were filled with pricey,

viscous, aromatic, bath gels, overflowing

the sides of the cars like honey from a

serving spoon.



He was very frightened; no one knew his

secret when we bust in on him. Said if

we didn't back off he'd press the button

and send us to another dimension.



Found my wallet on a bench in the ticket

office stuffed with coupons for fishsticks,

otherwise the way I'd last seen it.



He pulled the lever anyways but nothing

happened. Then he was really scared.



The walls of the ticket office fell down

and there was confetti everywhere.



I was so very bored by the situation that

I walked off into the hills by myself and

realized I'd left my gun in the ticket office

about the time I woke up. Malcolm was

screaming the words from an In Sync

song, purposfully out of tune, and doing

that Caligula dance to try to get my

attention behind me.

Fish Market

Next: Yo-Yo Ma Apocalypse Previous: bonjour monsieur science teacher Report Privacy ADD TO EBOOK