...and there's rain coming down like the night time and the water washes the dirt and shit from the streets. the dead animals, bellies burst open from tires and skin leathery and hard from the sun, float above the gray and brown water and rush along the sidewalks down the gutters, into the drains, and through the sewers. everything ends up in the ocean, and that's where we are: the beach. the ocean is white, shaking, and full of crashing. you look at the little corpses floating in the ocean and you point them out to me, laughing, and you say that there's so many. i don't think it's right for you to laugh but i love you too much to tell you to stop. the birds fly down from the sky and they surround us, not seagulls but little black birds with long feathers on their heads. 'they're magic birds,' you tell me, 'their feathers allow for wishes, any wishes.' the birds look at us and stand still on the sand. you run along the beach, not caring about the wind or the rain. i look back at the ocean. the waters churn and the animals corpses disappear -- the white caps on the water look so clean and pure. it backs up into a wave and then opens above me, above us, the water soaking all of my clothes, picking me up, and then tossing me. the air comes out of my lungs in bubbles...i push my head above the surface and fill my lungs with air and salt and filth. i swim back to the shore but you're gone. the sand's all wet from the waves and the magic birds flew up in the air, startled. they land on the ground and sit still again, looking at me. where are you? i wonder. but god's on the beach. it's god and he looks like a clown wearing makeup and a red clown's outfit. he has an erection and he's looking at me, crying black tears and he's telling me, she's gone. she was taken away by the waves. you're god, i say, bring her back to me. please. but he says, no, i can't. the souls of those who drown can't make their way out of the swirling water and they're lost forever in the ocean. but the birds, i say, they can help me. they can grant any wish... yes, he says, you're right. go to them, and they will release her soul to me so that i may bring her back to you. and i go back to the place where the birds were but there's only one left, in the mouth of a cat that is already taking it apart....
